Sunday 7 August 2022

Talk, talk and talk some more!!

This is a rather personal post for me, but one which I really felt the need to write after recently losing my beloved Grandma.

You see, although my Grandma was 96 years old, we always thought she was as strong as an ox and would probably outlive us all. However, after recovering from COVID, she caught pneumonia, and within a couple of weeks sadly passed away, as she simply didn't have the strength to fight it. When the realisation hit us that she was close to the end, it suddenly dawned on us that she'd never discussed her final wishes with anyone! So, despite her being weak, my sister tried asking, and the most we got, was that she wished to be cremated, but that was it. We also found to our horror, that she rarely talked about herself or her childhood! She knew everything there was to know about us, about her neighbours, her friends etc, but she shared very little of herself, so we knew nothing.

Hence this post 😢 

When it came to arranging the funeral, we had no idea what she would have wanted, so we just had to do the best we could. The trouble with this was that we felt so damn guilty! What if she didn't like those songs? What if she wanted it in a church? What if the flowers were wrong? The questions we raised with ourselves were endless, and sadly, ones we'd never know the answers to, so can only hope that we did her proud.

You can avoid all this by simply talking. Don't sit quietly on the sidelines, tell your story, make someone listen!

Talk to your friends and family, tell them what you love, what you hate, how you feel, your favourite colour/music/book/food etc, tell it all and then tell it some more!! And for those who are being talked to, LISTEN, take notice, remember and admire. I'm guilty of rolling my eyes when my Gran started talking on occasions, but if I could turn back time, I would listen intently, make a mental note, and most of all, ask more questions. 

I really can't stress enough how important communication is between people, and I wouldn't like anyone else to feel the guilt that myself and my family have been feeling since my Grandma passed, so do me a favour and just talk.

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